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N the good old days we were told that it was the norm that the would-be bride must be married as a virgin. We were also told that the pride of men or every groom is to have the blood-stained bed sheet after the consummation of their marriage. In fact it was a huge shame on the bride s family if the case becomes contrary. Huge disgrace not only to the groom winter wedding outfits wedding dresses with halter neck, wedding dresses with halter neck,, but also to his family; the bride s family and consequently it could end the marriage prematurely. Those were the days when morality was held at a very high esteem. The days when modesty was the name of the game. You know affordable bridesmaid dresses , the days a romantic relationship of any kind was held with utmost discretion. God help any suitor who will boldly or publicly declare his love overtures without consulting the parents of the lady in question. Those were the days when ladies were too shy to look eyeball to eyeball into a man s eyes. The days when no lovebird would dream of walking hand in hand in public.

The days when it was a taboo for ladies to visit men in their homes alone without a chaperone. Those were the days when men will not ask to sleep or have sex with a woman outside the confine s of a wedlock, traditional wedding dresses traditional wedding dresses Those were the days when pregnancies were after marriage and not the other way round.

Those were the days when it was thrilling and adventurous for a man to continuously woo the woman of his dream and she played hard to get so that she would not appear cheap, discount wedding dresses discount wedding dresses men loved the chase. The fun of wooing a lady who then stares at her fingers and on the floor, never looking straight at him because she was too shy to do so. The days when virginity was practical and not theoretical.

Those were the days when brides wore white wedding gowns wedding gowns as they walk down the aisle to meet their groom. The white wedding gown was meant to be a symbol of purity. That was and is what the white wedding gowns is supposed to stand for, ideally. Have you ever wanted to know what men really feel about a woman s virginity, or lack of it on their wedding night? I even heard some place that women in India also wants virgin husbands. Research findings shows that one third of men still desires and wants virgin brides. They want the reality of being the first in their women s life. Ironical isn t it? I consider this ironical and hypocritical. Note that the way the men were in the past is certainly not the norm now. Things have changed. People have thrown morals, modesty and cautions to the winds. These days a man can woo a secondary school girl and expect to have her in his bed few days after buying her N200 recharge card.

These days, special occasion dresses a man can comfortably woo and date three different girls and of course sleep with them all in exchange for a few thousands of naira he spends on them. These days a man will dump a lady who refuses to have sex with him even when he has proposed marriage. These days our men will tell ladies that if they refuse them sex, it means they don t love them. Imagine! A cousin of mine who has vowed to preserve her virginity till her wedding night was recently dumped by her soon-to-be husband who insisted on taking her to bed before marriage, so that their love can be cemented . She told me in tears that after giving his options a serious thought she has made up her mind to give in to him; she has decided to lose her virginity instead of losing her fiance.

They got married alright, but she was three months pregnant at the time of their wedding, off the shoulder a line wedding dress she said her man is happy with not only the premarital sex but happier still that she got pregnant as a result. So, what are we talking about. A man insists he wants you in his bed; before marriage. Some even expect you to get pregnant before marriage so that they are reassured that the woman is fertile.

Are these the same men that desires virgin brides? If they are, so what then becomes the fate of those women they have hitherto slept with and the man that will marry them wedding dress long sleeve wedding dress long sleeve? It is ironical indeed. Naturally, men s tongue are quite sugarcoated and so oftentimes women become unwilling victims. I say unwilling because sometimes women, in a bid to please their men summer wedding gowns , will go extra mile and sleep with them, just to keep the relationship going or something;. However, since times have changed, people have also changed with the times. I feel it is wrong for men to insist on or desire virgin since they know they have deflowered many in their wake. The idea of Virgin Brides I dare say is gone to the winds; no thanks to the men who will pester informal wedding dresses tea length , cajole, persuade, sweet tongue women into their beds as a criteria for keeping relationships. The worst hit nowadays are the students, no, not just the undergraduates but our secondary school pupils. I have been told by a secondary school girl that even okada riders comes to pick up the students for free.

Of course you and I know it is never for free). At the time they picked the female students they refuse to pick any other customer (for obvious reasons). Yet, even these men would in future desire virgin brides. It is not all that bad. I know we still have the decent individuals who still believe in abstinence. They are those that still believe in sex within the confines of marriage. For these group of people, I say thumbs up. For those who have since lost their virginity through no fault of theirs, I still say thumbs up; you are not to have the full blame. Afterall it takes two to tango.

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I feel like for the first time in my life I'm completely happy with my style and my closet. I feel that I'm being true to myself basing decisions not on what's popular or necessarily stylish but what makes me happy. I believe that clothes should do three things - they should make you look good feel good and positively impact your mood. And now that I'm nearing my 25th birthday I believe that every item in my closet accomplishes that.

I should note that I didn't get here overnight it was a long and winding road. When I first started buying my own clothes I was attending a high school in South Carolina. A very Southern preppy and cliquish high school. Wanting to fit in I dressed according to the "dress code" which consisted of Lacoste polos anything J. Crew (think J. Crew 2000 not 2009) North Face and boat shoes. Deep down I hated it. It wasn't me. Not the washed out chinos evening gowns not the polos with the collars turned up and definitely not the boat shoes. Yet there I was getting out of my car every morning looking just like one of the 1500 girls at that school.

Then came college. I consider my first few years of college a time when I got in touch with my "feminine&nbsp gowns bridals side." I "matured" very late freshman year of college to be exact and I was in love with my new body. I loved all the curves and I loved showing them off - mini skirts tight shirts mile high heels... the whole nine yards. Though I was having more fun with fashion things still weren't quite right and by the end of my sophomore year I was starting to feel uncomfortable Wedding Ceremony black dress evening silly even. So I packed up my baby tees the skirts that looked more like washcloths my A&ampF arsenal of ripped jeans and the low cut shirts. It was the end of an era.

For the next couple of years I live in no man's land. I tried out dozens of styles and my closet had a revolving door - in with trendy out with classic or visa versa. I tried keeping up with "what's hot" and found the endless search for the "it bag" "it jean" "it necklace" exhausting. I couldn't keep up and that sort of existence drains your bank account quick. It made fashion seem like a chore. I was constantly perusing sites like Gilt and RueLaLa lest I miss out on a sale for "this season's boot." I wasn't shopping for myself I was shopping for what people would think about what I bought. It was ridiculous.

And then this summer everything changed. I remembered how much I loved color and dresses! And bows! And fun shoes! And menswear! I stopped shopping for what was popular sexy "in red bridal gown " or cool and started shopping for me. And boy was it fun! You want to know the most ironic thing about this change wedding ball gowns I shopped less. Because I wasn't shopping to keep up with anyone or anything I wasn't running to the mall every chance I got. I still peruse stores and websites everyone once in a while but I only buy things that really stand out or catch my eye. For example the "popcorn dress" I bought recently - I saw it on Calypso's website a few weeks ago and I couldn't get it out of my head. When I saw it in person and saw how well made it was and how classic the cut was I knew I had to have it!

So here's a small list of my "style maxims" that I use now

• Quality over quantity. Instead of buying fifty $20 sweaters in the winter I hold out for when that divine cashmere cardigan goes on sale at J. Crew and buy it. Just do the math let's take five average sweaters at $20 each that will be unwearable in two years - that's $100. Now take one $60 cashmere sweater that will last at least five years...
  
• Buy trendy items at places like Target Forever 21 and Old Navy. I have a few shirts I picked up at Target this year for no more than $20 some fun pants I got at Old Navy for around the same price and accessories from Forever 21. Then when I clean out my closet at the end of the year I don't feel bad about getting rid of those things.&nbsp
  
• If I really love something and it's quality and classic - I buy it. But there is a caveat I have to stop buying other stuff. For example if I buy an expensive dress one month I will not be buying random shirts and pants.&nbsp dresses for evening
  
• Stick to classic prints and colors. When I buy sweaters I stick to two colors long white dresses gray (classic) and pink (fun). When I buy cardigans I look for stripes (classic) and polka dots (fun). When I buy tops I stick to fabrics like cotton (fun) and silk (classic). This way I can still have fun with clothes but I'm also making sure that I'm spending at least 50% of the money on items that will have staying power.
  
• I only buy bags or shoes that I NEED. Over the past six months I bought two pairs of shoes one expensive pair for Kevin's Christmas party and a pair of black flats (I didn't have a pair of black flats). In the past six months I have bought zero bags. I just don't need any. I have every type of bag I could ever need in every color. I stopped paying attention to what the "it bag" was a long time ago. It's unproductive and very expensive. And because the bags and shoes I've bought in the past were quality there is no need for me to worry about replacing any of them for a long time.&nbsp dresses brides bridal hair styles

And just because I love you here is a photo of me in my infamous orange sweat suit that I wore pretty much every day my sophomore year of college. Kevin really enjoys making fun of it. And I hate him for it. We all made mistakes!!!!

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